Exploring Parental Identities: How Single Black Males Understand Fatherhood in the Absence of Their Fathers

Abstract

This qualitative study was exploratory in nature and involved the collection and analysis of data from Single Black fathers in Northern California raised without a father in the home. Fathers in our study shared that they navigate their roles as single fathers through trial and error and by making a personal commitment to do what is necessary for the well-being of their children; they refuse to allow obstacle to get in their way of their effort to be a responsible, caring father. The absence of their fathers was a prevalent factor that increased the devotion they have for their children.

Keywords

Black fathers single fathers fatherhood Black males

Introduction

In preparing for this research we spoke with a young Black male who shared his disappointment with his role as a new father. During our conversation he shared that he had fallen short as a responsible, caring parent and he was looking for a solution that could change his situation. He shared that he had not been present in his son’s life and the few times he had visited the child he was impatient, frustrated and he felt uncomfortable and detached. Not because he did not care about the child; but as he explained, he was at a loss of how to conduct himself when in the presence of his son. He also revealed that conversations with his girlfriend and her mother around financial support for his son made the few visits he had with his son extremely difficult. He revealed that he had no source of income and was unable to contribute monetarily. As the young man shared his experience as a new father, one could easily detect sadness in his eyes and an overwhelming disappointment in his inability to fully make sense of his role as a father.

The more we talked, it became apparent this young man was unable to make sense of what it meant to be a father and he had no clear understanding of how to take responsibility for a life outside of his own. In conducting this research, we have had numerous conversations with Black males who have expressed similar struggles associated with their roles as fathers and making connections with their children. Sadly, Black fathers have long been viewed as invisible men in the social science literature regarding parenting and fatherhood (McAdoo, 1998). Not having the knowledge or the ability to understand one’s role as a father is common among young Black males across the nation (Connor & White, 2007). However, Black men have not always struggled with their role as fathers. The history of African fathers and their involvement in their children’s lives is well documented. Gutman (1976) characterized Black fathers as men with cultural strengths who were connected to their African heritage which included taking an active role in ushering their sons into manhood. The notion that Black fathers were rendered powerless during slavery in the United States is pervasive throughout the literature (Hooks, 1981).

According to Hamer (2001), after being brought to America as slaves, Black fathers, brothers, and husbands were sold away or otherwise separated from their families without notice. Black men who attempted to play a role in the lives of their children, or stood with their families were either hanged, whipped, beaten, or subjected to isolation (Akbar, 1984). The desire of Black fathers to remain together with their families was subordinated to the economic interests of the slave owner (Hamer, 2001). Following emancipation, Black fathers underwent further abuse as ex-salves and harsh racial discrimination placed them at a severe social-economic disadvantage which made it challenging and extremely difficult to meet familial obligations (Hamer, 2001). Black fathers lost control of their families not because of ineptitude at parenthood but because they were not allowed to be a father to their children (Akbar, 1984, 1991; Grier & Cobbs, 1968). It was the horrific effects of slavery that contributed to the disbanded family bonds for Black men in America (McLeod and Tirmazi, 2017). Davis and Jordan (1994) contend that slavery wrought undisputable changes in Black families, which included Black males being denied the opportunity to assert their roles as fathers and caregivers for their children.

A report by the United States Department of Health and Human Service (1996), showed that Black children are more likely than White children to live in a home without the father being present. Less that 40% of Black males live in two-parent family homes, and most will spend a large part of their childhood years in homes without a father (Demo & Cox, 2000; U.S. Census Bureau, 2002). Hunter et al. (2006) used an interpretivist approach to explore young African American men’s reflection on coming of age and the meaning of “father loss.” Based on 4 focus groups with 20 African American male participants who varied in age, education, social class, and family background, it was discovered that young men positioned themselves ideologically and constructed their identities around the absence of a father. How a young man eventually learns to make sense of his role as a father stems from what he learns from his father; however, if there is no father present in the young man’s life the learning never occurs. Having a father at the beginning, the middle and end of a young man’s development adds considerable value to his life in profound ways (Smith et al., 2005). However, the absence of a father negatively impact a young man’s life in important ways.

When a young man’s father is present in his life, he has someone who will take responsibility to actively build a foundation on which he can use as a guide for conducting himself in the future. Badger et al. (2018) concluded that children without a father in the home are more likely to grow up with fewer resources and less attention directed toward social emotional development. In addition, they added that the presence of a Black father figure in a neighborhood, even if not in a child’s home, makes a difference toward the development of a boy and how he might function in a fathering role. According to Threlfall et al. (2013), a positive supportive father promotes his child’s well-being and is thoughtful at nurturing social-emotional needs of the child. The presence of a caring father plays an important role in how his child learns to communicate and foster meaningful relationships in the future. Each of which prepares the child for the role as a conscientious father in the future (Leventhal & Brooks-Gunn, 2000).

In the next section we will present a review of relevant literature that informs the design of this study, followed by the theoretical framework, the research questions, the methodology followed, and a presentation of key findings and conclusions.

Literature Review

Historically, the literature has indicated that the issue of absent Black fathers is a phenomenon that merits attention in the United States (Kreider & Elliott, 2009). Accordingly, Baskerville (2004) asserts that absent fathers in Black households is a social concern that appears to be escalating across the nation. He further indicates that absent fathers are linked to increased tendency toward violence, substance abuse, truancy, unwed pregnancies, and psychological disorders. In their work on the study of Black fatherhood, Johnson and Alford (2016) reported that absent fathers fail at teaching their sons proper masculine roles which ultimately impedes the child’s understanding of basic rules associated with fatherhood. Similarly, in her work on father absence and the mental health of Black boys, Joiner (2016) discusses absence fathers and their association with low levels of self-esteem among boys. Further claims were made on absent fathers and their lack of contribution to the child’s inability to develop healthy, balanced relationships. Conner and White (2009) submitted that only a small minority of Black fathers continuously live with their children throughout their childhood, which begins to answer questions of how young men are able to quietly and effectively disassociate themselves from responsibilities as fathers and caregiver. Data on absent fathers indicates that 57.6% of Black children are living in single parent homes (National Center for Fathering, 2016), while the 2016 Census Bureau’s Population Survey, indicated that 23.6% of children under age 17 live with their mother and about 50% of Black boys live with their mother compared with 16% of their White counterparts.

Fathers and what they symbolize can shape opinions and set the stage for how young men come to understand their place in society and their underlining of social obligations. When a child’s father is absent, Christmon (1990) asserted that the child’s self-image and the extent to which he is ready for fatherhood and paternal involvement is almost nonexistence. The literature supports that there are substantial benefits of a father’s involvement in the life of his child. More precisely, it explains that training, role modeling, and well-developed father and son relationships can positively influence how a young man learns accountability as a compassionate father in the future (Chandler et al. 2011). The literature acknowledges the value a father plays in parenting and preparing his child for a fathering role; it also acknowledges paternal absence among Black fathers as pervasive problem that complicates lives.

The literature suggests that absences among Black fathers persist for a variety of reasons (Patel & Mavungu, 2016). In her work on missing Black fathers, Reynolds shared that Black fathers have always been constructed as absent from parenting and they have failed at expressing a willingness to accept responsibility for their behavior. Additionally, Reynolds (2009) explained that attempts to understand fathering identities among Black men should be acknowledge through appropriate historical and cultural contexts. Failing to acknowledge that there might be historical factors that contribute to absent fathers among Black men can lead to a lack of clarity when engaging this issue altogether. Supporting this claim, Green (2001), suggest that Black men face numerous structural and systematic challenges along with racism, oppression, and powerlessness that directly affect their roles as fathers. This further supports that historical factors should be considered when thinking about parenting, fatherhood, and Black males. This consideration highlights advocacy for historical and cultural parenting education, mentoring, and discussions that lead to long term support for Black males and their role as future fathers (Richter & Morrell, 2006).

There are gaps in the literature as to what mothers do for the development of her son as a responsible father; nonetheless, it is clear that fathers have the ability to guide their male children’s development toward fatherhood in important ways. Edin and Nelson (2014) explained that involved fathers serve as role models and teachers for their sons. Comparable findings from Baker’s (2014) work concluded that Black fathers who are involved in their children’s lives have a positive impact on a child’s social and educational attainment. Similarly, Aquilino (1997) found that father and son dynamics that are developed during earlier stages have long-lasting effects on the family life of the child. With this, important questions emerge: how are young Black males expected to make informed decisions regarding their role as fathers in the absence of their fathers, and how does a young Black man, as a new father, understand and assimilate the basic expectations associated with fatherhood? The purpose of this study was to gain an understanding of how Black males raised without the guidance of a father come to understand and “perform” their role as fathers.

Theoretical Framework

We use the social-ecological theory of social development Bronfenbrenner (1979, 1986, 1989; Bronfenbrenner & Morris, 1998) as the primary theoretical framework for this study. Bronfenbrenner’s theory consists of five interconnected “environmental” systems that range from the individual within close interpersonal interactions, to the broad influences of institutions and cultures. The five systems are: the macrosystem, exosystem, mesosystem, microsystem, and chronosystem. For this study we focus directly on the microsystem, which centers on the individual and the people in his life. The microsystem includes the specific settings in which an individual spends time: school, home, the neighborhood, church, etc. The cultural ecological model explains the means by which cultural groups transfer specific skills between generations (Ogbu, 1981)—for example, that the role of the father is to ensure that the child has the skills he needs to become a competent parent in the future (Threlfall et al., 2013).

Within each microsystem, the child has direct interactions with his father, who directly impacts the child’s self-esteem, sense of responsibility, individual knowledge, and social development. For Bronfenbrenner (1989), the individual is not simply a passive recipient of experiences in these settings but, like all human beings in all settings, is someone who reciprocally interacts with others and helps construct the settings themselves and the meanings of the settings to the self and to those around him. Therefore, at any given time, a father within the microsystem can directly act as a support for parenting skills and social goals, or that same father, in his absence may act as a barrier. Building on Bronfenbrenner’s (1979) microsystem a present father can substantial impact his child’s role as a future father along with social outcomes within the microsystem.

This research employs a cultural ecological perspective (Bronfenbrenner, 1989) to consider how the absence of a father leads to understanding one’s roles as a responsible father. The basic theory is that individuals must master particular tasks in order to perform their role as a accountable father. Black fathers may have the same ultimate goals for their children, caring and providing for them as do other parents from any ethnic/racial background.

Research Questions

The following research questions are the focus of this study:

How do single Black males raised without a father learn to navigate their role as fathers?

What understanding of fatherhood do Black single fathers have, and in what specific ways does their understanding influence how they carry out their role as fathers?

Methodology

This qualitative study is exploratory in nature and involved the collection and analysis of data gathered from participants in Northern California. The purpose of the study was to gain an understanding of how Black males raised without the guidance or the direction of a father come to understand their role as fathers and caregivers of their children. Qualitative methods were used to gather data for this study because the researcher wanted an opportunity to capture responses from participants while giving them the chance to share lived experiences and personal knowledge on their understanding of fatherhood along with roles associated with raising their children. Importantly, qualitative research allows the emergence of themes and patterns that provide a deeper understanding of the issue (Patton, 2002).

Participants

Seven Participants were selected through purposive maximum variation sampling. This method of sampling allowed the researchers to interview participants who maximized the diversity relevant to the issue being researched by virtue of their knowledge and or experience (Etikan et al., 2015). We were able to identificatify and select individuals who were willing to share their experiences and opinions in a coherent, expressive, and thoughtful manner, which in turn provided a unique perspective on how single Black males understand their roles as fathers. Participants were selected from Village Connect a mentoring and coaching program in San Leandro, California that provides various resources to young men in the community. The central focus of the program is to build the social, educational, and mental capacity of its members so that each individual experiences a positive transformation sustainable through self-awareness and self-direction. The seven young men who participated in our study took part in a one-on-interview and completed a written questioner. Participants were single fathers who had been raised without a father in the home, they were between the ages of 19 and 30 which made Village Connect was an ideal program to reach participants for our study.

Instruments

The interviews specifically focused on lived experiences and personal thoughts on absent fathers and fatherhood. More specifically, the questions focused on how participants understood their role as fathers and the many expectations associated with raising their child/children without the guided knowledge or instructions from their fathers. The prompts were developed to extend, illustrate, and deepen our understanding of the research questions, they specifically address parenting, absent fathers, the role of a single father along with parenting roles and responsibilities. The one-on-one interviews were structured in nature; however, the questions were designed in such a way to allow each participant the opportunity to speak openly based on individual experiences. There was no time limit for the interviews, which allowed participants the freedom to respond to questions in a comfortable and relaxed manner.

Data Analysis

We approached analysis of the surveys both inductively and deductively with the goal of discerning themes and patterns that would give rise to a structure for future empirical research. In his work on Transforming Qualitative Research, Boyatzis (1998) argues for connecting the language of research to themes. Following procedures outlined by Boyatzis (1998), we first began the analysis by reviewing data and applying inductively-derived codes to data. These codes were then grouped and regrouped into themes based on similarity. We then considered these themes more deductively in relation to themes derived from our review and synthesis of the literature. Using matrix displays (Miles & Huberman, 1994), themes were then mapped and cross-case comparisons were generated.

Findings

The average age of the participants was 27, the average age of participants when they became fathers was 23. Six of the seven participants shared that they were raised by their mothers while only one participant indicated that he was “. . .raised by his grandmother.” It is important to note that neither of the participants demonstrated resentment toward their mothers or their grandmother, in fact they spoke fondly of the women who cared for them and did their best at raising them. There were various circumstances that led to participants being raised in single parent homes; but, only one participant indicted that his father had passed when he was very young. Participants had an average of two children that ranged from 2 months to 11 years in age. Of the seven participants, two of the fathers lived away from their children while the other participants indicated that their children lived with them. This report is an initial attempt at understanding how participants envision their roles as single fathers without the benefit of training or guidance from their fathers. Initial review of the interviews and surveys revealed two overarching themes: (1) fatherhood and being a father requires a personal commitment and dedication regardless of obstacle that might arise (2) being present and active in a child’s life was a way of acknowledging one’s role as a father.

Being a Father Is a Personal Commitment

The central challenges of fatherhood and being a father were defined in terms of what the respondents expected of themselves. Participants shared that they never had anyone teach then what it meant to be a father and how to care for their child. One respondent stated, “I never really was taught nothing about being a father”; he went on to say, “my mother played both roles, of course, but I pretty much had to learn about being a father by myself.” Likewise, a second participant stated, “I wasn’t taught anything about being a father. I always heard what a father was supposed to do, but there was no examples of it in the house.” A participant stated, “My mother tried teaching me about being a man, but she did not do a good job.” In their work on same sex mentoring, Bogat and Liang (2005), Rhodes (2002), and Sullivan (1996) suggested that boys are more likely to benefit from engaging with caring adult males, which supports the need for same-sex mentors willing to educate and support young men being raised in single parent homes. Another participant stated, “I was not taught how to be a father. I was taught how to be a player; literally, I was taught to have three to six girlfriends and they all needed to know about each other.” Without the guidance of a father or a positive role model, some young men are manipulated to follow a destructive paths that perpetrates stereotypes and offers no rewards in the end.

Young men in the study developed their own ideas of how they understood what it meant to be a father. It was their individual perceptions that gauged how they conduct themselves as a father. A participant stated, “We all have a choice of whether we want the whole fatherhood thing or we just want to be someone who is a father.” Participants understood that anyone could father a child through the act of getting a woman pregnant; however, they explained that fatherhood involved a personal commitment. It was this personal obligation that defined their level of caring and responsible that would be attached with their role of a father. A respondent stated, “being a father is an actual duty” that “. . .involves a set of values.” In the absence of the their fathers, participants established values and used those values to guide how they performed and carried out their role as a father. A participant shared that, “Fatherhood is the role that you play, it is all the things that you go through to be a father, be it good or bad. . .it’s the time you put in and the connection you have with your child.” Finally, a respondent stated, “a father is a person that’s there for you.” Each of the participant decided that they wanted to be there for their children; which was a personal understanding they were committed to seeing through.

How participants understood their role as a father was formulated on rules and obligations based on a personal understanding and feeling. One participant state, “I don’t think anyone can teach you how to be a father, I think it’s something that you learn as you go.” Another participant said, “. . .It’s not about learning how to take care of your children it’s knowing how to take care of yourself so that you can care of your children.” Participants also indicated that they learn from the children. A respondent added, “Taking the time to invest in what they have to say, I’ve learned how to do that. . . they [my children] taught me how to do it.” Participant believed they had a personal duty, regardless of the difficulties associated with the job of being a father to be good fathers for their children. They learn how to be reliable fathers by staying involved with their children and by trial and error. A respondent stated, “I can’t say that anyone specifically taught me anything about being a father. . .It was more so trial and error.” In the absence of their fathers, participants have expectations of themselves and a personal expectations along with a desire to do right by their children is how they make sense of being a father.

Of the seven participants, only one respondent shared that he had received guidance on how to conduct himself as a father; while he was in jail: “. . .it wasn’t until I was incarcerated where my wilderness director/mentor taught me the concept of fatherhood and how to be a man in general.” Jackson et al. (2014) shared that a well-structured mentoring relationship is a key element that leads to social success for young men of color living without a father in the home. This is supports a need for concerned adult males mentors for young men being raised without a father in the home; however, the mentoring must start at an early age so that incarceration can be avoided all together. In the absence of proper guidance on how to conduct themselves as fathers, each of the participants managed to develop compassion, concern, and a love for their children. It is their empathy that defined their behavior and establishes their commitment to being positive, supportive fathers for their children. Each of the respondents revealed that they cared for their children and they were motivated to being influential in their children’s lives regardless of never being taught this by their fathers.

How participants understood what being a father meant was a reflection of how they conducted themselves as a father. One participant stated, “a father. . . is someone who is involved, someone who is willing and able to teach you the things necessary to survive.” He further stated, “fatherhood takes tremendous courage and strength because it is difficult to raise a human being and give everything you know, but you gotta provide the necessary things that a child needs to move forward and grow.” Regardless of never receiving training and guidance on what it meant to care for a child and the value attached with providing for someone other than themselves, participants were able to speak clearly about the courage it takes to be a father and to show concern for another human being. A participant shared that “fatherhood has so many challenges and obstacles that you have to go through, so in order to be a father you have to go through those challenges to experience fatherhood.” With their limited understanding of fatherhood and being a father, each of the participants expressed a willing to go through the process of learning how to be a father in order to provide and care for their children.

Participants expressed as personal commitment to doing what was necessary for their children. “I do what I gotta do to make sure that their [his children’s] basic needs are met, I’ll do whatever I got to do.” Another participant added, “I go to work, get a check, and go grocery shopping, I bought my oldest some skates for Christmas and they are interchangeable from M1 to rollerblades, so whenever she wants to go skating she can.” Another comment included, “I buy everything he [my child] needs so he doesn’t have to want.” One participant explained that as a father you can never be prepared “. . .unless you have things like money.” Another respondent added that he felt prepared as a father because the months he waited for his son to arrive he was “. . .saving money and finding work.” Without being coached by their fathers, participant understood that financial stability had to be an important part of their commitment to their children’s well-being. A participant said, “I find that I need some money or some extra money to make ends meet.” A participant explained that, at times, he loses sleep thinking about money and how he is going to care for his kids. He ended his thoughts with, “I gotta do what I gotta do to make sure the girls are taken care of.” In spite of the research that suggesting that Black fathers are not involved or economically supportive of their children (Davies et al., 2004; Dawsey, 1996; Kaplan, 1997), Black fathers in our study were very concerned with making certain they were economically prepared to care for their children.

Participants believed they were prepared to be fathers. This person confidence held by the participants strengthened their resolve and elevated their duty to their children. A participant stated, “I believe that I’m prepared because for one, it starts mentally.” He further explained, “I had like nine months to mentally prepare myself for this [being a father].” Each participants developed his own individual understanding what being prepared meant and this guided their performance as a father. Another comment included, “It was more so watching; growing up and seeing other friends with their dads. A lot of my parenting skills come from T.V. and film.” There is no specific formula that explained what being prepared meant for the participants. According to participants, being prepared as a father comes in many different ways. A respondent stated, “Going to the fatherhood boot camp gave me a much better and clearer understanding on how to be father.” While another response stated, “I kind of picked it up [skills on fatherhood] along the way.” Another participant shared:

“I feel like I am a prepared father because I show up and even if I don’t know all the answers, I’m willing to find out all of the answers, I’m willing to spend time, I’m willing to go to work every day, I’m willing to go to programs to figure out what I can do to communicate more effectively with my child.”

Being Present in their Children’s Lives

According to Black et al. (1999), children do not benefit from the mere presents of a father. Therefore, if a child is to benefit from the present of his father, the father must be child centered and emotionally devoted to the well-being of his child. Participants in our study felt a personal responsibility to do right by their children which included being present, taking an active role in their kids’ lives and they expressed a willingness to care for their children. One comment included, “Just being there whether I’m a good parent in that moment or a bad parent in the moment, I’m there.” Another participant stated, “You have to be present in your child’s life to really be there for them.” He further added, “If you’re not present then they’ll feel like you aren’t there for them.” Respondents were not taught that being present in their child’s life was an ingredient for being a responsible father; nonetheless, they associated fatherhood with being present and making their presence known by being responsive to their child’s needs. Another respondent said, “Being present and being active shows that there is someone who cares.” He went on to add that, “If you can be active in your kids life and you’re not, then I associate that with a person not caring.” This was supported by the another respondent who said,

“It’s the time I spend with my child that gauges my caring. . .just being there and responding to them is what encourages them to grow.” Another comment included,

“I didn’t have my father. I did not have him as a role model. I feel like parents, especially fathers, have that most powerful roles in the household, that’s why I am there for my child.”

In their work on absent fathers Patel and Mavungu, (2016) suggested that paternal absence among Black fathers is a pervasive problem that complicates the lives of their children and creates unhealthy patterns. Because of absence fathers in our participants lives, they developed an urgency to be present and active in their children lives. Their objective was to make certain their children would not feel the emptiness they felt. A respondent stated, “I feel like being there in your child’s life is everything, especially for fathers.” He continued by saying, “. . .a lot of what I learned of how to be a father is from the things I didn’t get.” Throughout the interviews participants communicated that “being there” for their children was important. One comment included, “I take care of my business, I go to work and I stay out of trouble so I can be there for my son.” Another participant said,

“I can almost say, hey Dad, screw you, but thank you, your absence has made me the very opposite of what you were as a father. . . .your absence sort of gave me the strength that I needed to become a person much better than you.”

Regardless of disparaging messages communicated throughout the literature regarding Black fathers, participants in our study showed that a missed connection with one’s father can lead to a stronger bond with a child further down the road. Comments shared by participants included:

“It [not having my father] makes me, honestly, like love him [my son] a lot more and like be more open to him and everything about him. Because, you know, I wish I would’ve had a dad to have been there for me. He would’ve, he just, he was killed right before I turned two, so it was kind of one of those situations to where it’s like, you know, I would’ve had a father but, you know, he was taken out of my life so it just makes me want to get on the right path for my son.”

“Growing up without a father has helped me shape and interact with my boys. I know the importance of a father. So, that [not having a father] sort of helped me, you know, shaped my relationship with my son, knowing that, you know what I’m going to do things different. I’m going to be present, I’m going to be available, I’m going to be active, and I’m going to have influence in my son’s life.”

The disappointment of not having a father in one’s life can serve as a positive motivator. More importantly, it can also influences how an individual comes to understand his role as a father. Other comments shared by participants included:

“I can remember specific times in my life, probably like 5 or 6 all the way through the teenage years where there were specific moments where I would wish that my father was there. Like when I won a basketball game or when it was a parent day at school or something like that. And so, when I’m interacting with my children, I always try to keep that in mind. I always use that to be like okay I know how I felt when my father wasn’t there at this point, so I’m going to make sure that regardless, whether my son is doing a singing song in class to his parent day or it’s a picnic day or whatever it is, I try to make sure that I’m there and interacting with them because I remember how that made me feel.”

“I care for them [my children] by spending time, being at the daycare, talking to their teachers, listening to them when they have something to say or when they want to share something with me. No matter how off the wall it might be. With my children, I can see where my parent missed opportunities and it makes me want to invest in my kids.”

Participants’ understanding of fatherhood is influenced by a number of factors each of which informs how they experience embark on their journey as a father and experience fatherhood. In the absence of their fathers, participants educate themselves and learn by doing what they think is the best possible action at the given time. In all, they are inspired by a desire to make a difference and to make certain their children can feel the love they have for them. What is a valuable finding is that these individuals have a personal desire to be active in their children’s lives and they do their best to make sure their children do not experience the same disappointments they experienced because of an absent father. One participant stated,

“I’m not the most richest or wealthiest person, I’m just a young man trying to figure things out day by day to make sure my kids have everything that I didn’t have and I’m not just talking about toys. I didn’t get too much knowledge from my parents, they gave me a bunch of B.S. and I learned a bunch of crazy stuff from the streets. Each and every day I’m with my kids, it makes me discover a little bit more about myself and how to be a father.”

Discussion

The purpose of this study was to gain an understanding of how single Black fathers raised without a father in the home come to understand their roles as fathers. The analysis of the data revealed two important influencers that motivated fathers in the study and contributed to how they understand their responsibilities as fathers in the absence of guidance and support from their fathers. These factors included: (1) fatherhood and being a father requires a personal commitment, and (2) being present in their child’s life is a way of acknowledging fatherhood. These salient factors contribute to how single Black fathers understand their roles as fathers and learn to care for their children regardless of not having received leadership from their fathers.

In their work on the study of Black fatherhood, Johnson and Alford (2016) reported that absent fathers fail to teach their sons proper masculine roles which ultimately impedes the son’s understanding of basic rules and values associated with fatherhood. Despite being raised without a father in the home, participants in our study communicated a commitment to being present in their children’s lives. Which involved being child centered and being emotionally devoted their children. A respondent stated, “I am committed to being an active father. . .being there for him [my son] is my biggest goal,” Another comment included, “I am committed to my kids. . .because [caring for my children] it is the right thing to do.” Their commitment was motivated by a desire to assure themselves that their children would not suffer the same discomfort they experienced from not having their fathers present in their lives. A participant stated, “I am committed because no one was committed to me.” How participants have come to make sense of their role as fathers is directly associated with what they experienced and their experiences and these experiences have motivated them to want more for their children. A another responded said, “I am committed to taking care of any and everything my daughter needs, not because it’s my responsibility but because it’s what my father didn’t do.” In spite of not having their fathers to teach them how to conduct themselves in their roles as fathers, participants believe that being involved in their children’s lives was more than being a good father, they understood it as a show of devotion and an act of love toward their children. More so, participant were concerned with making certain their children would not endure the same discomfort they were forced to tolerate in the absence of their fathers.

Fathers in our study did not always understand the ins and outs of fatherhood; but, they viewed themselves as guardians and important figures in their children’s lives. They expressed that they wanted “to do right by their children,” regardless of personal, and financial difficulties and not always knowing the right way to do things these fathers were driven to make a difference for their children. This supports the need for programs specifically designed to educated and open lines of communication for single Black fathers who are determined to break the cycle of absent fathers. A participant stated, “some of the difficulties I face is not having a stable job, or home but I get up every day and do my best.” A respondent said, “I care about my child because he is my child! A son of God. . .a direct reflection of myself.” These fathers have a desire to create positive outcomes for themselves and their children. It is the absence of leadership and support that creates the many obstacles that cause separation between a father and his child. A participant shared that he experiences trauma from not having his father in his life. He went on to explain that he cared deeply about his son and he worries constantly about the child. He ended by saying, “I wonder if I have what it takes to provide for my son.” This reinforces the need for deliberate programs intended to build character, increase socialization skills, and improve parenting roles for Black fathers. A participant shared that his biggest difficulty as a single father was “. . .finding and having support.” While a second participant stated that there “. . .was a lack of resources for single Black fathers.” He went on to say, “everyone expects fathers to have it all together.”

Kreider and Elliot (2009), suggest that the issue of absent Black fathers is a phenomenon that merits attention in the United States. Declarations from participants in our study suggest that regardless of not being taught the fundamental principle of fatherhood these individuals are determined to do better for their children than was done for them. Through lived experiences and through trial and error, participants learned to navigate the many responsibilities associated with being a father. While it is honorable these fathers are willing to stumble in the dark to know how to care for their children they should not be subjected to “trial and error” in their efforts to care for their children. If single Black fathers are to truly be effective as caregivers, they must have directed support, at an early age, from committed same-sex adult mentors who are willing to provide long-term strategic mentoring and fill the gap of absent fathers. Additionally, there is a need for policies and research that focus on parenting practices and values that encourage young, single Black fathers to connected with this children. These policies and research should purposely address racial, cultural, social, and historical aspects of Black families with a specific objective of encouraging Black fathers. Also, there is a need for planned community program designed to raise awareness and create ongoing dialog within Black communities.

Conclusion

While the literature rarely views Black fathers as caring, loving individuals emotionally committed to their children, and its commonly suggested that Black fathers fail at expressing a willingness to accept responsibility for their children (Daughty, 2014); data from our study suggest otherwise. A participant said, “my son continues to amaze me I want to be around every day to see what he does next.” Fathers in our study learned to navigate their roles as fathers through trial and error and by making a personal commitment to do what they felt was necessary for the well-being of their children, while refusing to allow obstacle to get in their way. Participants also believed that in the absence of guidance and support from their fathers, they learn as you go in there role as a father. Regardless of not having a father to teach participants how to conduct themselves as fathers, each of the participants had individual understanding of what being a father meant to them; it was this understanding that motivated them to be present and active in their children’s lives. This study allowed for a more complete understanding of how single Black fathers theorize their roles as caregivers in the absence of their fathers.

Black single fathers are scrutinized and, in most situations, they are never given the benefit of the doubt. Individuals analyzing Black fathers almost never allow themselves to understand their dreams and how they feel. A participant said, “A goal that I have for my son is a great education, he should learn about all the good this world has to offer.” Another comment was, “One goal I have for them [my children] is to finish school and go to college. I have to somewhat lead by example and make an effort to show them that I am doing what I can to make things better.” Fathers in our study shared data about their lives and the struggles they endure because of absent fathers in their lives. It’s important to acknowledge that participants in our study are breaking free of the disparaging narrative that disrespectful evaded their lives. However, at the same time there are numerous Black males living in single parent homes with little or no contact with their fathers or supportive role models willing to usher them into their roles as future fathers and its unknown whether the issues will improve anytime soon (Daughty, 2014).

Attention must be placed on precise ways to support Black males who have not had fathers present their lives. Evans (2000) suggests that the presence of a structured mentoring program with caring adults who coach, sponsor, motivate, and serve as role models can positively influence outcomes for young men being raised in single parent homes. Among other things, it’s the lack of communication and the absence of thoughtful same-sex role models concerned with sharing positive values of fatherhood that contributes to disconnected fathers and broken homes in Black communities. Mentoring at an early age can equip these young men with the needed tools to navigate their roles as future fathers. Additionally, well-structured mentoring programs as offered by Village Connect can fill gaps of absent fathers, provide leadership, character development that can change the path of future father and child relationships for years to come. Fathers in our study learned from how to conduct themselves as fathers by trial and error; however, rather that learn from trial and error future fathers should learn about being a father and fatherhood from experienced, caring adult males. In their work on mentoring Chandler et al. (2011) described mentoring relationships as unique partnerships through which the mentor encourages the mentee’s collective growth.

Footnotes

Declaration of Conflicting Interests

The author(s) declared no potential conflicts of interest with respect to the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.

Funding

The author(s) received no financial support for the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.

ORCID iD

Quintin Leon Robinson

Author Biography

Quintin Leon Robinson’s work highlights ways school administrators, teachers and community partners can collaborate to change educational outcomes for all students. He focusses on issues related to the educational decline of Black males in urban schools. As a professor his aim is to keep the conversation of school success and Black males going.

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