Abstract
My daughter started kindergarten during the 2019–2020 academic year. She was so excited to start school. In fact, we had been discussing the start of her kindergarten experience for several months in advance because Daphne likes to be prepared. She needs all of the details so she can be “ready for everything,” as she puts it. She looked forward to making friends, learning new subjects, and meeting her teacher. Most important to her was recess time because of the playground. Daphne could not wait to climb the jungle gym. She thrived in school. She made friends and learned new subjects. When the spring 2020 semester arrived, no one could have predicted that a global pandemic would upend our schools. Consequently, we were required to shift the ways in which we provided education to our students. I have several examples of how I strived to meet the needs of my students despite all that was going on during that time. You probably have several examples of your own. We all have stories about our experiences and the ways in which the global pandemic impacted and in some instances continues to impact us personally and professionally. It has been really challenging for us all. I think about students, like Daphne, who have had an educational experience that was significantly impacted by the global pandemic. For her, the inability to be in community with her peers and teacher was particularly challenging. Now in third grade, my daughter is starting to experience a different school space—one where she is able to participate in clubs and events with her peers and families are allowed to enter the building. She is really enjoying third grade. Every day, she comes home with a story of what she learned or what new game she and her friends created. School is “so awesome,” as she often says.
I am mindful of the need to give grace and compassion to my daughter as she navigates her educational experience. Furthermore, I am mindful of the need to extend grace to myself and compassion to others as we navigate our journeys. Daphne affirmed for me that having a community is important. She had some challenges with the isolation that ensued due to the global pandemic. I, too, experienced similar challenges (she is her mother’s daughter, after all). Similarly, I observed these challenges in the preservice teachers that I educate at my university. For many of them, the transition to a virtual environment was difficult. For instance, I received several questions and concerns about online norms, classroom expectations, the need for assignments to be revised, and flexibility with due dates. These represent just a few of my preservice teachers’ struggles. I am sure there were others that I was not aware of that had a significant impact on them as well. Again, I am mindful of the need to extend grace and compassion to my students as they navigate their educational experience. I am a firm believer in the fact that one cannot be too gracious or too compassionate. It is just not possible! These are qualities that never go out of style.
My extension of grace and compassion has been a great way for me to initiate and build relationships with others. Often, the grace and compassion I extended to my preservice teachers was not expected. It caught them off guard. They expressed their gratitude and demonstrated their appreciation through kind email messages—messages like “Thank you for caring!” or “I appreciate your flexibility with this assignment.” My extension of grace and compassion led to more engagement with my preservice teachers. The increase in engagement allowed me to build meaningful relationships with them. At our core, we all want to feel valued, cared for, and appreciated. My extension of grace and compassion was a demonstration of their importance to me.
Building relationships with others is critical, especially as it relates to areas of importance to us such as our work, our family, and our community. Indeed, literature is replete with data demonstrating the benefits of positive student-teacher relationships. For instance, these relationships impact students’ development and academic growth. Thus, the quality of the teacher and student relationship is important. Additionally, there are data to support the need for positive relationships among colleagues. As colleagues who are in community together, these individuals may serve as resources or sources of support. These examples demonstrate the importance of building relationships with others. We must take the time and make the effort to cultivate these relationships with others. I argue that extending grace and compassion is one strategy we can use to do so. Of course, work is required to build and sustain relationships, but grace and compassion can get us through.
At the Council for Exceptional Children (CEC), we are working to support the development of positive relationships among members through Affinity Groups. The goal of the Affinity Groups initiative is to help CEC members connect and bond with other members that have similar backgrounds or identities. Affinity Groups represent a safe space where individuals can share their experiences or work toward a CEC-related goal. Membership within an Affinity Group is voluntary and based on an individual’s identification with that specific background or identity. Examples include race, gender, sexual orientation, nationality, language, ability, and so on. Affinity Groups bring individuals together over a commonality and create opportunities for relationship building.
I want to give you a few questions to ponder. Do you believe relationships are important? What are you doing to build and sustain relationships with your students and colleagues? Are there opportunities for your improvement? Could you exude a little more grace and compassion in 2023? As you ponder these questions, I encourage you to continue building—building stronger relationships with your students and colleagues and building a bigger community of support for yourself and your family. You might consider developing Affinity Groups at your school district or within your school. Building relationships with others is important! At CEC, we believe building relationships is important, too, given that an aspect of our mission focuses on building networks, partnerships, and communities. I hope you will continue to join us in this important work!
Footnotes