Leading-Following and Mentoring: Making Connections

Humanbecoming Paradigm and Models

The humanbecoming paradigm (Parse, 2014) is a unique worldview with an ontology, epistemology, and methodologies (school of thought). Within the humanbecoming paradigm, humanuniverse is “indivisible, unpredictable, everchanging” (Parse, 2014, p. 26). There is cocreating of reality where “personal reality arises within the timeless moments of an individual’s ongoing history-making with living the becoming visible-invisible becoming of the emerging now” (Parse, 2014, p. 26). Parse (2014) wrote of humanuniverse as a “seamless symphony of becoming,” which is foundational to the ontology (assumptions, postulates, and principles) of humanbecoming. There are three principles of humanbecoming:

These principles mean that persons cocreate meaning with their choosings. There is a configuring of patterns, while persons live new moments cocreating what is about to be.

The humanbecoming paradigm has models that are congruent with its ontology; two such models are the leading-following model (Parse, 2008, 2021) and the mentoring model (Parse, 2021). The models are composed of assumptions, essences, and processes. Parse (2021) wrote that “the humanbecoming mentoring model can be used in conjunction with the humanbecoming teaching-learning model” (p. 174). Here, however, the mentoring model is discussed in light of the essences of the leading-following model to explore the ways in which mentoring arises within leading-following.

Leading-Following and Mentoring

The humanbecoming leading-following and mentoring models do not adhere to “traditional” definitions of leadership and mentorship (Parse, 2021). The models are unique and arise out of the humanbecoming paradigm. Parse (2008) wrote that “the humanbecoming leading-following model is born from beliefs about humans and humanuniverse as indivisible, unpredictable, everchanging. It is a guide to living leading-following with a focus on human dignity and freedom where power is with the constituents of situations” (p. 375). There are three essences that are inherent in all leading-following situations: “commitment to a vision, willingness to risk, and reverence for others” (Parse, 1997, p. 109). From a humanbecoming view then, “leading-following is deliberately innovating with potent engaging in persistently pursuing excellence; it is an indivisible, unpredictable, everchanging cocreation” (Parse, 2011, p. 371) (see Figure 1).

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Figure 1.

The Humanbecoming Leading-Following Model. Reprinted with permission from Parse (2021, p. 165).

In regards to mentoring, there are various traditional definitions of and attributes related to mentoring that may be used as a guide within leading-following situations in traditional nursing paradigms. For example, mentoring is “a complex interchange of give, take, readiness to learn, sensing of readiness to learn, and integration of the learner’s needs as perceived by both the learner and the mentee” (Goudreau, 2021, p. 363). Foster (2016) wrote that “an effective mentor is respected, reliable, patient, trustworthy, a very good listener, and a skilled communicator” (p. 97). In contrast, within the humanbecoming paradigm, the mentoring model:

describes mentoring in a way that shifts notions of mentoring away from traditional definitions of the term and places the emphasis on incarnating meaning, unfolding pattern, and discerning insight arising with impelling gentle urging, diligent loving presence, and affirming distinction. Mentoring from a humanbecoming perspective is a moment-to-moment unfolding of scholarly togetherness-aloneness in the indivisible, unpredictable, everchanging pattern of coming to know the new. (Parse, 2021, p. 174)

The humanbecoming mentoring model consists of three essences: committing with enthusiasm, diligent loving presence, and venturing with the new (see Figure 2).

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Figure 2.

The Humanbecoming Mentoring Model. Reprinted with permission from Parse (2021, p. 175).

Connections: Leading-Following and Mentoring

The first leading-following essence, “deliberately innovating is committing to a vision with vigorous energizing,” has the processes of “committing to a vision” and “vigorous energizing is enlivening commingling” (Parse, 2021, p. 167). These processes describe the ways creating something new arises with a dedication about something that is important. This dedication is living what is important, while bringing others “along” to “see” what may be possible. Parse (2021) wrote “it is moving an idea or program by staying with the vision as it unfolds, which requires living with ambiguity, trusting personal integrity, and honoring wisdom” (p. 167). A commitment to moving new programs and ideas forward is congruent with the humanbecoming mentoring model’s first essence, which is focused on commitment too: “committing with enthusiasm” is described by Parse (2021) as “eagerly undertaking a pledge” (p. 176) (see Figure 2).

“Eagerly undertaking a pledge” is the way in which a mentor and protégé (a seasoned leader and an inexperienced leader) pledge to an experience that meets mutually agreed upon actions. This essence has the process of “impelling gentle urging is awakening vigor with the deliberate availability of being there without judging” (Parse, 2021, p. 176). This is the way a leader and a protégé leader may be with and spend focused time with each other. This focused time is dedicated to what the protégé would like to accomplish or learn by spending time with the mentor; what is accomplished is explicitly discussed so that the mentor may provide advice and guidance. Parse (2021) wrote:

the protégé makes clear the intentions of the mentoring situation, and the seasoned scholar with gentle urging is deliberately available for consultation with the protégé for planning ways to live out the desired intentions with the becoming visible-invisible becoming of the emerging now. (p. 176)

The time spent with leader and leader protégé changes over time, as expectations are met and not met requiring shifts in learning priorities.

The second leading-following essence is “potent engaging is willingly risking in living with ambiguity” (Parse, 2021, p. 168) with the processes of “willingly risking” and “living with ambiguity.” Parse (2021) wrote that “willingly risking is daringly venturing forth” (p. 168). It is the ways in which leaders and followers may look beyond what they “normally do” to seek new approaches to common issues or concerns. These new approaches must be thought about together and discussed so that all involved are heard. Parse (2021) wrote that willingly risking “involves playing with possibilities about what could be and abandoning the secure in favor of shifting pattern preferences in the situation” (p. 168). In regards to “living with ambiguity,” Parse (2021) wrote that it “is moving with the vague” (p. 169). It is the way leaders and followers move toward a vision without always knowing exactly how the vision will unfold. There are many moments of doubt with agreements and disagreements, as all involved find “their way” as individuals and as a group. Parse (2021) stated that “living with ambiguity in leading-following is abiding with vague potentials and propelling with the not-yet-fully-known explicitly to untangle the knots of obscurity. Opposition in the form of deliberate confrontations and subtle disturbances often surfaces when engaging with others” (p. 169). These “confrontations and subtle disturbances” arising within “potent engaging” may be connected to the second essence of the humanbecoming mentoring model.

The second essence is “diligent loving presence,” which Parse (2021) defined as “an intentional graceful nonintrusive way of being with another” (p. 176). This essence has the process of “attentive respecting,” which “is honoring disclosedness in communing with regard for potentiating choosings” (p. 176). This essence and process are about the ways in which a leader and leader protégé are with each other, respectfully, so that the pattern preferences of each are honored, even during difficult mentoring moments that are unexpected. The leader is respectfully “there” to bear-witness and guides the protégé, as the protégé reveals the unfolding focus of the mentoring relationship. With each choosing of the protégé, there is a shift in the direction of the mentoring relationship. Parse (2021) wrote that “all choosings move participants in a direction with opportunities and restrictions. In attentively being with the other in a mentoring experience, there is at once a distancing that offers space for appreciating the ambiguities alive in mentoring situations” (p. 177). As the leader and leader protégé “look beyond” to new ways of leading-following, there must be respect for each other’s views and choices as they reach for the not-yet.

The third essence of leading-following is “persistently pursuing excellence is revering others with vigilant attending” (Parse, 2021, p. 169). The processes are “revering others” and “vigilantly attending.” Revering others is “honoring the uniqueness of individuals by not expecting each person to contribute to the vision in exactly the same way” (Parse, 2021, p. 169). Vigilantly attending is “cautiously witnessing with wisdom the emergence of ideas and programs and heeding with graciousness the surprises that unfold with the inevitable uncertainty that accompanies new endeavors” (Parse, 2021, p. 169). This essence and its process are about the ways a leader and leader protégé may explore many possibilities to expand the protégé’s experience and refine the protégé’s ability to “live” leading-following. These experiences are focused on excellence based on what the leader protégé wants to learn and refine; this is how the protégé will contribute to the mission and/or vision of what must be accomplished. In this regard, Parse (2021) wrote that “in persistently pursuing excellence, infinite possibilities emerge that call for wisely beholding the situation with quiet discreetness” (p. 169).

The notion of moving new ideas forward may be connected with the third essence of mentoring. The third essence is “venturing with the new,” which is “risking the sureness of the familiar, the comfort of the customary” (Parse, 2021, p. 177). The process of this essence is “prudently endeavoring,” which is defined by Parse (2021) as “thoughtfully acknowledging discoveries with the wisdom of witness” (p. 178). With this essence and process, the seasoned leader and leader protégé cocreate a relationship that changes over time as each speaks about the possibilities the future holds. These discussions disclose and hide what each holds to be important to move forward in meeting the protégé’s goals. These discussions are not always easy because there is always a risk of not being valued or not “conforming” to biased expectations. Parse (2021) stated that “unsureness is connected to the not-yet-explicitly-known regarding the desire to conform with what is expected in the mentoring situation, and also waning to be unique” (p. 177). With this unsureness, the leader and protégé must venture onward with a plan that will lead to success in meeting the mission and/or vision of the project, along with what the protégé wants to learn and refine.

Summary

In this paper, the author explored the ways in which the humanbecoming paradigm and its models may be used to lead and mentor others. There are many meaning-making moments within the leader-leader protégé relationship that shapes each person moment-to-moment over time. It is important that there is a nursing theoretical framework to serve as the foundation to build a professional relationship with a knowledge base that is unique and shared by the leader-leader protégé. The utilization of a shared knowledge based enhances the discipline and profession by “seeing” and “showing” how professional relationships may unfold across various leadership settings.