The Development of Perpetration and Tolerance of Sexual Harassment

Focus on binary gender/sex categories

From birth, parents and society commonly focus on the physical and psychological salience of their children’s gender/sex (with an overemphasis on the binary gender/sex identified at birth; Hyde et al., 2019). Specifically, parents often amplify the salience of a binary gender/sex by assigning gendered names, hairstyles, clothing, bedroom colors, decorations, and toy purchases (Leaper, 2015). In addition, children regularly hear gender/sex categories emphasized in gendered labeling of individuals and groups (“What a smart girl you are!” “Those two boys are playing ball”).

When categories are made physically and psychologically salient in this way, children are more likely to become attuned to the category and subsequently develop stereotypes about that category (for empirical evidence of this, see developmental intergroup theory; Bigler & Liben, 2007). Given how much gender/sex is used as a functional category, it is not surprising that children are very attentive to messages that gender/sex is important. By preschool, most children can identify their own gender/sex and attend to, seek out, and better remember information relating to their own gender/sex (Martin & Ruble, 2004). Children subsequently develop strong stereotypes about those categories. By preschool, many children endorse the stereotypes that girls are more likely than boys to be fearful, sad, and happy, and boys are more likely than girls to be angry (e.g., Parmley & Cunningham, 2008).

Parent socialization of different emotions

Not only are children attending to gender/sex differences, but parents also play a critical role in socializing boys’ and girls’ emotional and behavioral expression, particularly in ways that lay the groundwork for boys engaging in harassing and aggressive behavior toward girls and for girls’ discomfort at confronting that behavior. Previous research suggests that parents typically pay more attention to their daughters’ submissive emotions (e.g., sadness, anxiety) relative to their sons’ feelings, and this parental attention predicts girls’ greater expression of submissive emotions at school age (e.g., Chaplin et al., 2005). In contrast, parents are more likely to discuss, tolerate, and model assertiveness, anger, and aggression with their sons relative to their daughters (e.g., Letendre, 2007). Boys, in turn, tend to experience fewer negative consequences in response to their anger than girls do (Eisenberg et al., 1998). A possible relevant consequence of these two socialization trends (girls’ submission vs. boys’ assertiveness) is that, by early childhood, girls are more likely than boys to be uncomfortable confronting a peer, and they are especially uncomfortable confronting a male peer (for a review, see Green & Rechis, 2006).

Focus on appearance

Not only are girls, on average, socialized to be submissive, but they are also encouraged to focus specifically on their appearance. Between the ages of 3 and 6, more than half of girls pass through a “pink frilly dress” phase (Halim et al., 2014) marked by a rigid preference for a highly feminine appearance at the expense of active movement. They also express appearance-related concerns, such as asking for feedback or saying negative statements about their appearance (e.g., “Do I look pretty?” “I don’t like my hair/nose/bottom”; Tiggemann & Slater, 2014).

Conclusion

Beginning in infancy and increasing in early childhood, girls are often socialized by their parents and society to be affiliative, passive, and appearance focused; meanwhile, boys are encouraged to be assertive, and boys’ aggression is often tolerated or excused. This focus on girls’ appearance (coupled with submissive emotions) and boys’ aggression are the early developing patterns that play a key role in later tolerance of sexual harassment.

Peer segregation by gender/sex

By the time children enter middle childhood, they tend to play and congregate in groups of same-gender/sex peers; boys tend to play in all-boy peer groups, whereas girls tend to play in smaller all-girl peer groups (e.g., Martin et al., 2013). High levels of peer segregation have two critical consequences. First, as children spend more and more of their playtime interacting with same-gender/sex peers, they increasingly socialize themselves in gender-stereotypical ways, exacerbating previously smaller gender/sex differences (Martin & Fabes, 2001). Same-gender/sex peer groups have been shown to be particularly influential in the development of aggression and delinquent behavior among boys (Rohlf et al., 2016). In other words, as boys move through childhood, they tend to play primarily with other boys and become similarly aggressive. Second, because boys and girls are segregated, they are less likely to develop close friendships with one another, and they may fail to develop positive interaction patterns prior to adolescence (Martin & Fabes, 2001).

Pressure to conform to gender norms

Not only are children largely interacting in gender/sex-segregated peer groups, but they are also increasingly focused on conforming to gender norms for appearance and behavior. Conforming to gender norms has important implications for peer acceptance and social status because gender-typical children are more likely to be popular and less likely to be teased, rejected, and harassed than their less gender-typical peers (Jewell & Brown, 2014).

Being accepted by the peer group and being popular require different qualities for boys and girls. For girls, beginning in middle childhood, popularity equates with being nice; being pretty; and with age, being sexualized (e.g., Stone et al., 2015). There is a shift from valuing an attractive appearance (in which being well-groomed is the key criterion) to valuing a sexualized appearance. Across multiple studies using different stimuli, both boys and girls perceived sexualized girls (e.g., wearing a miniskirt, midriff shirt, and makeup) to be more popular and pretty than an equally well-groomed nonsexualized girl (e.g., wearing jeans and a blouse; Stone et al., 2015). By early adolescence, many girls aspire to emulate images of sexualized girls as a means of matching the cultural norm (McKenney & Bigler, 2016).

For boys, being accepted by the peer group and being popular means being dominant, sexually assertive, and aggressive. For example, popular boys are typically expected to be focused on dating girls or being “a player” (Jewell & Brown, 2014). When boys stand up for girls who are sexually harassed, they are often subjected to homophobic harassment (Reigeluth & Addis, 2016). Boys also regularly report feeling pressure from peers to be aggressive (Plan International & PerryUndem, 2018). Gender norms are especially rigid for boys, and boys who do not embody this dominant, aggressive form of masculinity are often devalued and ridiculed (Jewell & Brown, 2014).

Stereotypical media and toys

The building expectations that girls should be sexualized and boys should be aggressive are also reinforced by children’s media and toys. Research has robustly documented the prevalence of sexualized depictions of women and girls in virtually all forms of media (e.g., Ward, 2016). In an analysis of 10 of the most popular American television shows among White and Latina girls, evidence of sexualization of female characters was found in every one (McDade-Montez et al., 2017). Additionally, one of the most common themes in popular children’s shows is boys objectifying girls on the basis of their attractiveness (Kirsch & Murnen, 2015). Although girls’ media focuses on sexualized images, media marketed to boys (including sports programming heavily consumed by boys) promotes and models aggression, violence, and antisocial behaviors (e.g., Kahlenberg & Hein, 2010). When boys with feminine qualities are shown on television, they are often the butt of a joke (Myers, 2012).

Similar patterns also appear in toys marketed to boys and girls. Specifically, research shows that toys with aggressive components, such as action figures and toy weapons, are marketed to boys, whereas toys marketed to girls focus on adult-like (typically, sexualized) beauty (such as makeup and jewelry; Auster & Mansbach, 2012). More precisely, girls’ toys are often sexualized, as many popular dolls marketed to young girls wear leather miniskirts and thigh-high boots.

Conclusion

Throughout childhood, as children begin to value being accepted by their peer group, girls are encouraged to be sexualized and “nice” to conform to peer norms. In contrast, boys are pressured to be aggressive and are typically rejected or teased by peers (and media) if they show fewer dominant behaviors. By the end of elementary school, the sexual objectification of girls and the dominant behavior of boys becomes the cultural norm.

Sexualized gender stereotypes and homophobic harassment

As sexuality becomes more salient in adolescence and heteronormative sexualized media is regularly consumed, gender stereotypes become more sexualized (Stone et al., 2015; Ward, 2002). By adolescence, a majority of teens endorse sexualized gender stereotypes, in which girls are expected to prioritize their sexualized attractiveness for the attention and approval of boys, and boys are expected to be aggressively focused on the sexual pursuit of girls (Jewell et al., 2015).

Although much of the focus of sexualized gender stereotypes is centered on girls (e.g., the more girls endorse sexualized gender stereotypes, the more they downplay their academic abilities and the lower their academic motivation is; Brown, 2019), there are also implications for boys. Boys who do not conform to sexualized gender stereotypes often suffer social consequences from other boys. Namely, by not demonstrating the heteronormative sexual objectification of girls, they risk being the target of homophobic harassment, such as being called gay slurs (Reigeluth & Addis, 2016). Thus, for boys, perpetrating sexual harassment becomes a critical way to demonstrate heterosexuality, avoid homophobic bullying, and gain popularity. This appears to be effective, as social network analyses have shown that boys who perpetrate more sexual harassment are more likely to be popular than boys who perpetrate less sexual harassment (Jewell et al., 2015).

Aggressive sexuality in media

In the era of smartphones and easy access to unregulated Internet, adolescents are consuming media that is highly sexual, violent, and objectifying. Research has shown that adolescents—boys more so than girls—are first exposed to pornography (either intentionally or accidentally) between the ages of 10 and 14 (Peter & Valkenburg, 2016). Common online pornography websites are free, easily searchable, and require no age verification to open. Although the exact prevalence rates differ, it is clear that the vast majority of boys and girls have seen some form of pornography by the end of high school (Peter & Valkenburg, 2016). Not only is this media explicitly sexual, but it is also frequently violent; 88% of online pornography contains physical aggression, almost always perpetrated by men toward women (Bridges et al., 2010). Exposure to this type of sexually explicit material has been associated with the increased sexual objectification of women and greater acceptance of rape myths, in which women are blamed for being raped (for a review, see Ward, 2016).

Lack of school intervention

Despite the frequency of sexual harassment at schools, schools rarely have policies regarding sexual harassment, and teachers often ignore this behavior (Brown et al., 2022). Schools rarely cover sexual harassment, or even consent, in sexual education classes (Willis et al., 2019). When asked, teachers report that they are unclear about what constitutes sexual harassment, are unclear about their own schools’ policies, or are untrained in how to respond to sexual harassment (Edwards et al., 2020).

This lack of policies and training is apparent to adolescents. Girls report that although teachers witness sexual harassment, they rarely intervene (Brown et al., 2022). Even among the minority of students who report sexual harassment to an adult at school, more than one third indicated that either they received no protection from the teachers or the teachers treated them poorly, blaming them for the harassment (Brown et al., 2022).

Conclusion

By the end of adolescence, boys regularly sexually harass girls, in part because of a lack of previous positive interaction patterns, a desire to avoid being the target of homophobic bullying, a steady diet of sexual and violent media, and a school climate that ignores (and thus implicitly accepts) the behavior. For girls, their status is increasingly tied to sexual objectification by boys. At the same time, there are no clear sources of protection for the harassment they face.