Abstract
It’s January, and if you are like most people, you have at least contemplated a New Year’s resolution. I know—you want to get in shape in some way or another. For some, that means losing weight. For others, it might be spending more time with your families or learning a new skill. Or you may have a professional goal you’ve been wanting to pursue. I’m with you. As I write this, I am eagerly awaiting the birth of my second grandchild—the first child for my daughter. It is a time of new beginnings for her and us as a family. And while I want to be the best that I can be for myself and my family, I also want to continue to pursue challenging and satisfying professional and avocational interests. I have my New Year’s resolutions, and I want them to stick.
Blogger Dan Diamond states, “Self-improvement, or at least the desire for it is an American pastime.” Yet, the odds are against us. According to U.S. News, an estimated 80% of resolutions fail by the second week of February. The University of Scranton research suggests that just 8% of people achieve their New Year’s resolutions. How depressing!
When we are the ones who slip up, do we forgive ourselves? Or do we shame ourselves? We would never shame our patients. So why would we even consider shaming ourselves?
To be honest, only about half of us define a New Year’s resolution to begin with—I believe for this very reason. People expect they are going to fail anyway, so what’s the point? So, what can we do to improve our odds?
As diabetes educators, we are in the business of helping people make changes in their life. We provide support for how they can make those changes and maintain them. Yet in spite of our best support and their best intentions, they slip up now and then. It is not always because they haven’t tried. In fact, most of the time they do try, and when they don’t get their expected results, they get frustrated and quit. Life gets in the way, and they can no longer afford to keep taking their medication, or they get injured and can no longer walk, or it gets cold and dark outside so exercising becomes more difficult. You know—you’ve heard them all.
What do our patients do when things don’t go as planned? And what is your conversation with them when that happens? Do you do the blame and shame game, calling them noncompliant? Most likely you have a conversation about why things did not go well and help them problem solve a solution to the barrier(s) and challenge(s) they tell you about. That’s what we do as diabetes educators.
But what do we do when WE are the ones who slip up? We use those very same excuses we have heard from our patients. But what does our conversation with ourselves sound like? When we are the ones who slip up, do we forgive ourselves? Or do we shame ourselves? We would never shame our patients. So why would we even consider shaming ourselves?
We need to learn from our patients. And we need to learn from ourselves as diabetes educators and treat ourselves with the same care we give our patients using the same problem solving we encourage them to use.
Start Simple and Go Slow
We often set big audacious goals or extreme makeovers either professional or personal. It can feel good to think big, and sometimes it works. But for most of us, we have other things going on in our lives that can get in the way, and we are doomed to fail before we even get started.
You may remember, I moved over a year ago. I set a goal of being completely unpacked and organized with any updates done within my first year. I am now well past that deadline, and I didn’t get it all done. Primarily because I had my job and I just needed a break. I took some time to just enjoy my new home, time for friends and family, and even time just for me. I realized the house stuff will wait.
If there are multiple things you want to do, set a timeline for yourself. You don’t have to do it all at once. I remember once sitting down with my boss with my list of goals for the year. I had this long list of goals for my department and the diabetes program that included quality improvement efforts, marketing, new services, outreach programs, and several other things. I was proud of my plan, but as I watched my boss read it, instead of the praise I was expecting, she asked me a question: “Do you think this is realistic for one year?” My enthusiasm was replaced with a dose of reality. She was right. I rewrote my plan over a 2- to 3-year period, and my boss and I touched base regularly to review progress and make adjustments as needed along the way. Much more realistic.
We need to learn from our patients. And we need to learn from ourselves as diabetes educators and treat ourselves with the same care we give our patients using the same problem solving we encourage them to use.
If you have big things going on at work, it may not be the time to take on a big goal in your personal life and vice versa. Trying to do them both at the same time may cause you to burn out faster and to not do either one very well. If big things are happening at home and work, ask for help.
Believe me, when my daughter’s due date approaches, my work will be set aside, and my focus will be on her for those first few days. I told my clients and my coworkers, and you know what? Not one person objected. Everyone to a person said, family comes first. Be honest about what is going on in your life. People will understand and can become part of your support system. Do your work, and do it well. And when you are needed somewhere else, you will be supported. This is not ignoring your job, it is taking care of yourself so you can do a better job when you come back.
Be honest about what is going on in your life. People will understand and can become part of your support system. Do your work, and do it well. And when you are needed somewhere else, you will be supported. This is not ignoring your job, it is taking care of yourself so you can do a better job when you come back.
Be Specific
Be specific about the change you want to make and how you are going to do it. We ask our patients what specific behaviors they are going to use to reach their goal. You need to do the same. Maybe you want to lose weight and you decide to switch from your morning latte and try a variety of teas instead. That is one simple goal that could easily cut a few hundred calories from each day, and it is specific. Or you might decide that you are going to learn a new skill. A specific goal would be to sign up for a class, set aside the time to make sure you get there, and ask a friend to join you as an accountability partner. An accountability partner helps ensure ongoing support. For personal goals, find a friend or family member. For a professional goal, look for a mentor. You might choose to use your friends on social media or on an app to get virtual support. Find whatever works for you and stick with it.
Track Your Progress
Experts tell us that tracking progress toward our goals contributes to our success. We ask our patients to log their food, physical activity, and blood glucoses. In the Diabetes Prevention Project, tracking was determined to be the number one predictor of success. Now it is your turn. Every day, log what you have done toward your goal. Make a “to do” list for the next day and then review it every day to see if you did what you told yourself you were going to do. It doesn’t have to be long and detailed. And if you didn’t do anything that day, what was it that got in the way? The main thing is that you take a few minutes to be mindful about it. There are countless apps and manual diaries or journals available to help with this. It actually doesn’t matter what you use, just that you find something that works for you and be consistent about it. I know, this is a big goal in and of itself. Don’t beat yourself up if you miss a day. If that happens, forgive yourself and move on.
Find the thing that you want to change, make it simple and specific, and then do it.
Above All, Keep Believing in Yourself
All of the above will certainly help, but you will have pitfalls and slip ups that are just part of being human. You might also make a mistake or two. That’s OK. A mentor once said that if you’re making a mistake, it means you are doing something. Learn from it. Be kind to yourself. Remember to not shame yourself. Forgive yourself and move on. Change your strategy if you need to.
I know for myself, I plan to be my healthiest self in 2018 for myself, my family, and my work. I will take this time to do a refresh. I’m excited about both my professional and personal plans for 2018. Only I can make them happen. And I hope to be kind to myself if it doesn’t. Like we tell our patients, we are in charge. We make decisions every day that impact our life. We owe it to ourselves to not let ourselves down. Find the thing that you want to change, make it simple and specific, and then do it.
Happy New Year!
Help Put a Stop to Forced Non-Medical Switching
Make Your Voices Heard!
If you are aware of your patients being forced to switch medication by their insurance company or due to formulary changes, please go to the My Meds My Choice website (https://www.mymedsmychoice.org/) and complete the brief survey to document what you know about your patients’ experiences.